If it were like six years ago, I might be inclined to note that this (13 losses in 16 games) is sort of where, in a Behind the Music episode, the band hits the inevitable rock bottom because of substance abuse or the drummer loses his arm due to a car accident or hyper-ravenous rodents or something.

But it's not six years ago, so I'll note that it can only get better---and it will get better. But it didn't get better last night. Let's see:

• John Patterson? "Dead arm."
• Brian Schneider? Trying not to drive himself crazy.
• Shawn Hill, Livan Hernandez? Elbow, tweaked knee.
• Stan Kasten? Still not officially in charge.
• Congress? Ineffectually interceding into the MASN/Comcast thingy:
  The U.S. House of Representatives yesterday approved a measure urging the Federal Communications Commission to act upon a year-old request by the Mid-Atlantic Sports Network that could force the Comcast cable company to end its refusal to carry most Nationals games to millions of fans.

  The House Appropriations Committee said in a report that it "strongly urges the FCC to act expeditiously upon the complaint . . . regarding Washington Nationals baseball."

  "I brought it up at the hearing, and we came to the conclusion that inserting this language would be good to let the FCC know that on behalf of the folks who live in this area, these games should be on TV," said Rep. Jose E. Serrano (D-N.Y.), who said he asked the language be inserted because he wants to watch Nationals games on television.

Just kidding---Marlon's all man, baby.

* * * *

So I received this book in my figurative Christmas stocking a few months back, and I figure this is a good time to break it out---not much to talk about with the Nats at current. The book? Baseball Bafflers: The Grand Slam. Hey, cool. Must be better than the Catcher's Indifference edition.

Anyway, keeping in mind I hardly ever follow through on running features, I thought I'd try on a "baffler" for the people of the square table here:

Later on, I'll post the answer in "Read More."

As correctly noted:

1. third-base coach cannot physically aid the runner;

2. runner must re-touch the base he overslid before returning to second.