clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

TEDDY WINS!!... FINALLY!!! 1st Presidents Race Victory For Big Headed Version Of 26th U.S. President

After a long, long, long string of losses, Teddy Roosevelt finally won a Presidents Race this afternoon in Nationals Park. Let the celebrations begin...

Brad Mills-US PRESSWIRE - Presswire

The curtain call was a bit excessive and show-offy, and getting help from a fake Philly Phanatic is questionable, but at long last after ... uh, however many straight races without a win... [ed. note - "Sorry, I really wasn't paying attention to the Presidents Race for like the last 3 years outside of the time Jayson Werth led an insurrection and made funny comments about being the last remaining member of the Bull Moose Party."]... where was I ... Oh yeah, after however many races without a win, Teddy Roosevelt made everyone from John McCain to former Nats' president Stan Kasten happy when he finally... and I stress FINALLY!!! won a Presidents Race. The Nationals PR department hyped it all weekend and for those searching out clues they were there to be found. After three and a half innings in this afternoon's game the Presidents Race started and Teddy, who lagged behind as usual due to his lack of conditioning and sub-par technique, was on his way to losing yet another race when a fake Philly Phanatic emerged from the stands and tackled Washington, Lincoln and Jefferson, allowing the gold-cleated 26th President of the United States to claim his first victory after 500-something races in RFK and Nationals Park. If you missed it, posted the video. Enjoy. Will the gimmick survive? Does Teddy go on an unstoppable win streak now? Will we have to wait another 500+ races for win no.2? Who knows... ? [ed. note - "Don't say, 'Who cares?!?!'"]

• Teddy Wins: