The 2017 season is still a ways away, but Bryce Harper’s Instagram and Twitter feeds do not understand the concept of an offseason. Harper has posted photos and videos of himself lifting weights, of his wedding, a McDonald’s, and a whole lot of other things.
However, his latest photo, a pitch black foreground on a pitch black background with a subject that is not exactly visible definitely provokes some thought...
Actually, it provokes only one thought: Why exactly would Bryce decide to put this on both Twitter and Instagram?
Now, the most obvious answer, especially given Harper’s tendency to post on Instagram and Twitter quite a bit (as in more than a few times a week) is that he was bored and just wanted to post something -- we’ve all been there before.
However, that explanation is pretty boring and not really worth writing an article about. So let’s think about some alternate reasons for why Bryce put this on his Instagram.
1. He’s blacking out in protest for not having a closer/bench/bullpen:
Bryce Harper has been one of the Nats’ most visible critics this offseason — first with his one-word exclamation regarding the acquisition of Adam Eaton, and later about Matt Wieters, Greg Holland, and the Nats’ new spring training complex — so maybe he’s so angry that he’ll refuse to post anything but this photo of nothing until the Nats have a new closer?
2. He’s actually celebrating the addition of a closer that we haven’t heard about yet:
It’s quite possible that the Nats have signed Greg Holland, or someone of the sort, and informed the team, but not the press. Thus, “lights out.”
3. It’s a photo of all the money he’s going to earn*:
Harper has been long-slated to be the first player to break the $400M barrier, if not the $500M barrier -- or more. So, it’s possible that his agent, Scott Boras, took him on a field trip to the bank vault of all his other clients, which has an infinite amount of money that collapsed into a black hole due to there being an infinite amount of money**.
*We aren’t sure if this science is sound.
**We aren’t sure if, despite rumors, Boras’ clients actually have an infinite amount of money.
4. He’s decided to become a professional photographer but forgot to take the lens cap off
Harper has posed as an art critic before, but maybe he decided to get in the game himself by becoming a photographer — it looks like his first shoot may have not been super successful.